OKAPI360

Should i marry him or her?

Voir le sujet précédent Voir le sujet suivant Aller en bas

Should i marry him or her?

Message par *Maadox le Mar 17 Fév - 18:43

i was having a discussion with a friend the other day and he said that if you have been with someone for 5 years, you known them for a long time so you should marry...I disagreed...You can know someone for 6 months and think that they are just the most wonderful person you have ever met. I told him that its not because you know someone for so long that its a match in heaven...he was like, then you never took the time to know them...its true...however, as much as time is important, its no indication that its the right person to marry.
Then he said, when you love someone, it means you agree to put up with shit and all...then you should marry...I don't agree totally. In my opinion, Love is a cement but friendship is the bricks...Looking around me, those couples who have forged a true friendship, the kind where they have become partners in deed and in crime, where they are best friends, those are the couples the most stable...Then he went on saying "if it feels right, then you should marry"....Yeah...but i know that it felt right before but i ain't with that person Razz ...and it feels totally right with this dude now...lol...but who says its the right person? I pray so.

In my humble opinion, friendship, common values, life plans even as different as they can be but somehow, you can see he or she fitting in those plans and vice versa, spirtual values and a true connection...but to top it all, friendship would tell u that this person is right...for you.

What are your thoughts/soul searching ideas?

*Maadox

Nombre de messages : 129
Date d'inscription : 16/11/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Le Negrier le Mar 17 Fév - 19:17

5 years is long time. I think that, after living with a person for 5 years, you should have a clear idea of if it is the right person to marry. I am not saying that after 5 years, if it wasn't a match, it is suddenly going to become one. However, you would know what it is.
Time doesn't necessarily change people. The common mistake we make is thinking that time changes everything.
On the other side, after leaving with a person for 5 years, why aren't you getting married if you think it is a good match? Are you afraid of the commitment that 'mariage' is?
I don't really get the difference you make between love and friendship. I think that to get married, there should be some love on both parts.

Le Negrier

Nombre de messages : 712
Date d'inscription : 11/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par CRyma le Mer 18 Fév - 14:00

Ah libala…qui marié qui ne pas marié. Est-ce que ce que l’on ressent pour cette personne et ce qu’on a vécu ensemble est suffisant pour nous rassurer dans notre choix ? Est ce qu’on doit être sure à 100 % pour faire son choix ou sur à 80 % ? Est ce qu’on doit avoir passé plusieurs années ensemble ou quelque mois avant de prendre cette décision ? scratch scratch

Trop de question dont les réponses varient d’un couple à l’autre, d’une personne à l’autre.

Par contre, je pense que rendu à un certain age, ces histoires de passé plus de 5 ans ensemble sans pour autant savoir ou la relation va, ne fait aucun sens Evil or Very Mad . Je suis d’accord avec vous quand vous dites que le nombre d’année fait ensemble ne devrait pas nous pousser (coincer)à épouser la personne, mais par contre je pense qu’en étant adulte responsable, il ne faut pas se mettre dans des relations à l’aveuglette. Il est important de savoir ou est ce que cette liaison nous mènera. Est-ce qu’on est avec la personne juste pour avoir quelqu’un à nos cotés ou parce qu’après avoir passé du temps avec cette personne, on le voit comme potentiel, futur, partenaire à vie.

Et c’est la que je rejoins Maadox en disant que l’amitié est le fondement de toute bonne relation. Les gens qui prennent le temps de bien se connaître avant de se lancer dans les histoires de cœurs, ceux qui se connaissent très bien entant qu’amis avant d’être lovers sont ceux qui, en majorité, font marcher leur couple.

En2k, c est un topic très subjectifs lol ….je suis d’accord avec ton ami Madoox, if it feels right, do it ohhhh mais still on doit apprendre à connaître la personne. Le temps ne change pas les gens, mais le temps nous permet de connaître la personne, de voir comment elle réagit dans X et Y situation, de voir à quoi ressemble sa gueule au réveille Laughing Laughing Laughing , de voir comment la personnes règle les conflit de couple, de savoir si nous sommes prêt à accepter ses défauts et qualité, si nos valeurs et croyance se rencontrent etc…une fois tout ça passé et que it still feels right … peut être que c est la personne.....si toutes ces conditions ne sont pas rencontrer et que it still feels right Very Happy ah peut etre que c est la personne aussi ! ! ! donc malgrés les differences, tu ne te vois pas avec une autre persone

CRyma

Nombre de messages : 1208
Age : 116
Localisation : ........ quelque part .......
Date d'inscription : 13/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Le Negrier le Mer 18 Fév - 15:59

CRyma a écrit: de voir à quoi ressemble sa gueule au réveille Laughing Laughing Laughing

ET TU PRENDS 5 ANS POUR CA??

Le Negrier

Nombre de messages : 712
Date d'inscription : 11/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par CRyma le Mer 18 Fév - 16:20

Le Negrier a écrit:
CRyma a écrit: de voir à quoi ressemble sa gueule au réveille Laughing Laughing Laughing

ET TU PRENDS 5 ANS POUR CA??

10 ans s'il y affinité Cool .

it was a joke très cher. Si tu relis mon intervention, tu remarqueras très bien que je suis contre ces fiançailles éternel

CRyma

Nombre de messages : 1208
Age : 116
Localisation : ........ quelque part .......
Date d'inscription : 13/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Nappy Soul le Dim 22 Fév - 21:37

Ma perspective sur ceci est qu'importe le temp qu'on passe avec une persone , on ne la connais jamais a 100%; allez parler aux gens qui sont marrie des 20-aines d'annees, ils vous diront qu'il y a toujours du nouveau a decouvrir, sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, et cela est vrais pour tout genres de relations.

A la fin de la journee, it's all about whether you want to marry or not. La qualite de l'amour que 2 persones ont entre elles, n'est pas valides par le mariage. Je refuse de croire a ces balivernes auquels la majorite des gens s'inscrivent. Persone ne pourra me prouver qu'un couple parce qu'il est marrie s'aime plus qu'un couple qui ne l'est pas, peu importe la duree de leur relation. Si vous etes un homme informez vous a savoir si le mariage est une chose qui ferra en sorte que la persone que vous aimez sois validee. De meme pour les demoiselles d'ailleurs. Ask your man if that's what he wanna do. Most guys will go along just to shut you up but that's me being a cynical beacuse I know in how much pressure men are whn it comes to marriage. Mettez vous sur la meme longueur d'onde.

Est ce que la mariage est important pour vous? Si oui...Just go ahead and do it. Si pas...fais lui savoir et donnes tes raisons.

Pourquoi un homme ne peut il pas refuser d'epouser une femme sans que l'amour qu'il a pour elle soit mis en question? ( meme pas par elle meme , mais par la "societe" aka toute une equipe de tantines songuaires) Qui a dit que la mariage etait la mesure ultime de l'amour?
On est tous differents, j'en ai marre qu'on essaye de vendre le marriage comme un uniforme que tout le monde doit porter pour vivre heureux. That's a damn lie.

Maddox at the end of the day...Marry him because that's what you both want. Don't marry him if one of you is not sincere on wanting to marry. Marry him if it doesnt bother him to marry you,despite the fact that he doesnt feel it's all that important.

The big picture here is that marriage or no marriage. You guys love each other. That's what matters.That's what should be kept. The rest is ...Snif! pig Do you smell that? Yeah! It is what it smells like...

Nappy Soul

Nombre de messages : 439
Date d'inscription : 06/09/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par *Maadox le Lun 23 Fév - 14:11

Well

Negrier...i don't think being with someone for 50 years means that y'all are meant to be together or you love that person...Love is a feeling...eros love...very unstable...unless we are talking about philos love...the kind of love that no matter what, bamba na mokili...
What i am saying is that...if you marry someone out of eros love...it ain't good enough coz eros is so unpredictable...u gotta have philos love...that's a friendship kind of love as a foundation...Eros is the cement. So in 5 years, i don't necessarily have to make someone my friend...whatever it is that can make us get by, we cool...that marriage ain't going nowhere...no matter if you live in the same house forever.

Cryma...it is true too that trying to know someone for 5 years is totally ridiculous...and unrealistic and excuses...aren't we surprised at our own changes throughout the years? If it feels right? True...that's the part where you live it up to God...our part is to have a friend.

Nappy o nappy...lol...antilibala...yaka to fanda sekoeee...lol.
Why does marriage freak u out so much? LOOOOOOOOOOOL

*Maadox

Nombre de messages : 129
Date d'inscription : 16/11/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par CRyma le Lun 23 Fév - 15:15

Nappy Soul a écrit:Ma perspective sur ceci est qu'importe le temp qu'on passe avec une persone , on ne la connais jamais a 100%; allez parler aux gens qui sont marrie des 20-aines d'annees, ils vous diront qu'il y a toujours du nouveau a decouvrir, sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, et cela est vrais pour tout genres de relations.

A la fin de la journee, it's all about whether you want to marry or not. La qualite de l'amour que 2 persones ont entre elles, n'est pas valides par le mariage. Je refuse de croire a ces balivernes auquels la majorite des gens s'inscrivent. Persone ne pourra me prouver qu'un couple parce qu'il est marrie s'aime plus qu'un couple qui ne l'est pas, peu importe la duree de leur relation. Si vous etes un homme informez vous a savoir si le mariage est une chose qui ferra en sorte que la persone que vous aimez sois validee. De meme pour les demoiselles d'ailleurs. Ask your man if that's what he wanna do. Most guys will go along just to shut you up but that's me being a cynical beacuse I know in how much pressure men are whn it comes to marriage. Mettez vous sur la meme longueur d'onde.

Est ce que la mariage est important pour vous? Si oui...Just go ahead and do it. Si pas...fais lui savoir et donnes tes raisons.

Pourquoi un homme ne peut il pas refuser d'epouser une femme sans que l'amour qu'il a pour elle soit mis en question? ( meme pas par elle meme , mais par la "societe" aka toute une equipe de tantines songuaires) Qui a dit que la mariage etait la mesure ultime de l'amour?
On est tous differents, j'en ai marre qu'on essaye de vendre le marriage comme un uniforme que tout le monde doit porter pour vivre heureux. That's a damn lie.

Maddox at the end of the day...Marry him because that's what you both want. Don't marry him if one of you is not sincere on wanting to marry. Marry him if it doesnt bother him to marry you,despite the fact that he doesnt feel it's all that important.

The big picture here is that marriage or no marriage. You guys love each other. That's what matters.That's what should be kept. The rest is ...Snif! pig Do you smell that? Yeah! It is what it smells like...

frangin, apres toute ces annees qu'on a eu a discuter sur le mariage, je n'arrive tjrs pas a comprendre prq tu y es si contre. je commence a me demander si ta position est seulement du au fait que tu veux etre different des autres.

pourquoi ne pas marier la personne que tu aimes ? la personne avec qui tu te vois passer les reste de ta vie avec ? ...

c'est comment meme scratch (avec un accent ivoirien lol)

CRyma

Nombre de messages : 1208
Age : 116
Localisation : ........ quelque part .......
Date d'inscription : 13/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Nappy Soul le Lun 23 Fév - 19:58

Laughing Me personally I have no problem with it. I have a problem with how society is trying to sell us mariage as the culmination of one's love life. I have a problem with people that drink that cool aid.

When I see my future I see myself married but not as a validation of my love for my partner but as a legal way to officialize our alliance ( Insurance policies, health benefits,legitimacy of offsprings, etc..); if she wanna go to church and make a big deal about it, I love parties too...But that's all that it will mean to me ( she got to be okay with that). The actual wedding in my mind= Symbolic ( often mixed with the religious circus that comes with it) function with a little party afterward so she can invite our friends and families to...make it official to everyone? Shocked

It makes love a little to vain in my humble opinion; specially given the fact , how many mariages end up in divorce. So no don't get me wrong I do think mariage is useful, just not for the reason advertised.

Nappy Soul

Nombre de messages : 439
Date d'inscription : 06/09/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Nappy Soul le Lun 23 Fév - 21:41

CRyma a écrit:
Nappy Soul a écrit:Ma perspective sur ceci est qu'importe le temp qu'on passe avec une persone , on ne la connais jamais a 100%; allez parler aux gens qui sont marrie des 20-aines d'annees, ils vous diront qu'il y a toujours du nouveau a decouvrir, sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, et cela est vrais pour tout genres de relations.

A la fin de la journee, it's all about whether you want to marry or not. La qualite de l'amour que 2 persones ont entre elles, n'est pas valides par le mariage. Je refuse de croire a ces balivernes auquels la majorite des gens s'inscrivent. Persone ne pourra me prouver qu'un couple parce qu'il est marrie s'aime plus qu'un couple qui ne l'est pas, peu importe la duree de leur relation. Si vous etes un homme informez vous a savoir si le mariage est une chose qui ferra en sorte que la persone que vous aimez sois validee. De meme pour les demoiselles d'ailleurs. Ask your man if that's what he wanna do. Most guys will go along just to shut you up but that's me being a cynical beacuse I know in how much pressure men are whn it comes to marriage. Mettez vous sur la meme longueur d'onde.

Est ce que la mariage est important pour vous? Si oui...Just go ahead and do it. Si pas...fais lui savoir et donnes tes raisons.

Pourquoi un homme ne peut il pas refuser d'epouser une femme sans que l'amour qu'il a pour elle soit mis en question? ( meme pas par elle meme , mais par la "societe" aka toute une equipe de tantines songuaires) Qui a dit que la mariage etait la mesure ultime de l'amour?
On est tous differents, j'en ai marre qu'on essaye de vendre le marriage comme un uniforme que tout le monde doit porter pour vivre heureux. That's a damn lie.

Maddox at the end of the day...Marry him because that's what you both want. Don't marry him if one of you is not sincere on wanting to marry. Marry him if it doesnt bother him to marry you,despite the fact that he doesnt feel it's all that important.

The big picture here is that marriage or no marriage. You guys love each other. That's what matters.That's what should be kept. The rest is ...Snif! pig Do you smell that? Yeah! It is what it smells like...

frangin, apres toute ces annees qu'on a eu a discuter sur le mariage, je n'arrive tjrs pas a comprendre prq tu y es si contre. je commence a me demander si ta position est seulement du au fait que tu veux etre different des autres.

pourquoi ne pas marier la personne que tu aimes ? la personne avec qui tu te vois passer les reste de ta vie avec ? ...

c'est comment meme scratch (avec un accent ivoirien lol)

Sista de mon kairr;
Je ne suis pas contre le mariage ; je suis contre ce qu'on nous dit qu' il represente. Ce que je refuse est de suivre le troupeau aveuglement sans que ca n'aie un sense dans ma comprehension de ce que l'amour represente pour moi. Pas parce que j'ai besoin d'etre different. Je me marierai probablement ( bientot? tongue ) mais pas parce que ca validerai l'amour que je porte pour la persone de mon choix. Si c'est ce que ca veut dire pour elle; je veut etre completement honete que ce n'est pas mon sentiment. Je ne serai jamais le type qui fait les choses sans vraiment les croire. ou accepter un fait parce que tout le monde l'accepte...It has to make sense to me. I might need someone to prove me wrong...Et jusque la y a persone qui me prouve que j'ai tort.

Nappy Soul

Nombre de messages : 439
Date d'inscription : 06/09/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Silver le Mer 25 Fév - 3:18

I was sent this , I thought It might help...


How to Tell When You're Ready to Commit
Eight key questions to ask your mate -- and yourself



There is something exhilarating about taking the big leap from dating to becoming a permanent "item" and making that final commitment. But before you run off into the sunset with your mate, make sure that the time you choose to commit is the right time -- and with the right person.
As a divorce attorney, I have found over the years that most couples who wind up splitting do so because there are discrepancies or control issues over what I term the "Big Six." These six categories include: wealth/property and money; children; health, physical and mental; growth, professional and personal; intimacy and loss of love; and fear, both physical and emotional. I ask my clients to take a close look at each of these categories to determine if there are major conflicts, not only with his or her chosen mate but also conflicts within themselves.
Have you found the right person? Is it the right time? Here are eight key questions to ask your mate -- and yourself. The answers will be very telling.

1. How do you believe we should spend our money and on what? If your mate says, "On fun stuff and we'll get to the bills later," you better reconsider going the commitment route until your mate grows up a bit. Most marriages and long-term relationships break up due to stresses and squabbles over money. Splits happen when a couple's values in spending and saving simply do not match. Don't overlook this question. It is critical in determining whether you or your mate are a match and whether you are both ready for a mature relationship -- one that requires fiscal responsibility.

2. What are your thoughts about starting a family? If your mate says, "This is not something I can even think about right now," do not ignore that remark. It could be that your mate will put this decision off longer than you wish or one day stand up and announce, "I've decided against having children." You also need to be honest with yourself. Do you want children? Let your mate know this up front. You may also want to ask your mate about his/her point of view on how the children should be raised. If there are huge discrepancies in this department, there are bound to be serious problems down the road.

3. If I get sick, how will you take care of me? If your mate laughs off such a question with, "How do I know? I'll figure it out then," you should take that offhanded remark as a serious indicator that your mate might not be grown up enough to handle your critical needs. There is a way to test this one: How does your mate treat you when you get sick with the flu? Also, if you know deep down that you would not have the patience or fortitude to care for an ailing mate, be fair and let him/her know of your concerns. Who needs someone in his/her life who is only there for the good times?

4. Do you envision us growing old together? If your mate quips, "How the heck do I know, that is a long way off" or "I guess so," neither answer should satisfy you. To suggest that you or your mate is uncertain of your eventual fate together -- or cannot envision those "golden" years as a couple -- should be a neon sign with bright red lights that flash, "This may only be temporary." Commitments should be thought of as permanent, not temporary.

5. Do you ever think about your ex? If the answer from your mate is "Well, I do sometimes," then you want to ask the next question: "In what context?" If your mate shares stories about the fun they used to have together, this could mean your mate is not over his or her last love. And what about you? Do you still think about your ex? When? How? I highly recommend backing off the commitment stage until you and your mate can safely say that thoughts about your exes are fleeting or random.

6. Has your mate ever told you they scared a former mate in any way? If your mate's answer is something like "Well, yeah, I scared my ex every time I became jealous or mad," step back and think twice. Though your mate may think he/she is ready for a commitment, it may not be the right time for one. If you have had similar issues, the same may apply to you. Are you worried your mate might cheat on you or keep secrets from you or inflict emotional or physical harm on you? If the answer is yes, tackle this now, not after you have made a commitment. Maybe you or your mate could benefit from therapy, anger management, rehab, or other appropriate behavior modification assistance.

7. Is your mate good at problem solving? Does your mate meet challenges head on and collaborate on solutions to problems, or sweep issues under the rug? What about you? Are you mature enough to approach your mate to say, "We have a problem. Let's find a solution to it." How you handle problems together may well determine how long your relationship will last.

8. How does my mate deal with a "screwup?" Does my mate place blame? Does my mate take responsibility for his/her actions? How do I handle my mistakes? Do we both acknowledge our errors and resolve to deal with them? If chronic, negative behavior persists in this area, take a second look to decide if you two are a good match and if you are ready to commit. It is not unusual, for instance, to have each partner blame the other, which rarely accomplishes anything. Placing blame, or finding fault, can only worsen once you are committed.




Silver

Nombre de messages : 2335
Date d'inscription : 04/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par *Maadox le Mer 25 Fév - 17:19

Thanks vrai silver...i guess we just need to understand that there is an element of unpredictability that will linger...However, we should do our homework.

So what y'all think about "better the devil you know then the one you don't?" as a basis for marring someone?

*Maadox

Nombre de messages : 129
Date d'inscription : 16/11/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par CRyma le Mer 25 Fév - 20:01

*Maadox a écrit:Thanks vrai silver...i guess we just need to understand that there is an element of unpredictability that will linger...However, we should do our homework.

So what y'all think about "better the devil you know then the one you don't?" as a basis for marring someone?

what about beeing with the angel that I know ? Razz


en2k, je ne connais pas l'expression, que ce qu'elle veut dire ? vaut mieux etre avec quelqu'un dont on connait les defaut, et que, meme si ses defauts la nous font mal on est pret à savoir les accepter ?

CRyma

Nombre de messages : 1208
Age : 116
Localisation : ........ quelque part .......
Date d'inscription : 13/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Nappy Soul le Jeu 26 Fév - 1:18

Silver a écrit:I was sent this , I thought It might help...


How to Tell When You're Ready to Commit
Eight key questions to ask your mate -- and yourself



There is something exhilarating about taking the big leap from dating to becoming a permanent "item" and making that final commitment. But before you run off into the sunset with your mate, make sure that the time you choose to commit is the right time -- and with the right person.
As a divorce attorney, I have found over the years that most couples who wind up splitting do so because there are discrepancies or control issues over what I term the "Big Six." These six categories include: wealth/property and money; children; health, physical and mental; growth, professional and personal; intimacy and loss of love; and fear, both physical and emotional. I ask my clients to take a close look at each of these categories to determine if there are major conflicts, not only with his or her chosen mate but also conflicts within themselves.
Have you found the right person? Is it the right time? Here are eight key questions to ask your mate -- and yourself. The answers will be very telling.

1. How do you believe we should spend our money and on what? If your mate says, "On fun stuff and we'll get to the bills later," you better reconsider going the commitment route until your mate grows up a bit. Most marriages and long-term relationships break up due to stresses and squabbles over money. Splits happen when a couple's values in spending and saving simply do not match. Don't overlook this question. It is critical in determining whether you or your mate are a match and whether you are both ready for a mature relationship -- one that requires fiscal responsibility.

2. What are your thoughts about starting a family? If your mate says, "This is not something I can even think about right now," do not ignore that remark. It could be that your mate will put this decision off longer than you wish or one day stand up and announce, "I've decided against having children." You also need to be honest with yourself. Do you want children? Let your mate know this up front. You may also want to ask your mate about his/her point of view on how the children should be raised. If there are huge discrepancies in this department, there are bound to be serious problems down the road.

3. If I get sick, how will you take care of me? If your mate laughs off such a question with, "How do I know? I'll figure it out then," you should take that offhanded remark as a serious indicator that your mate might not be grown up enough to handle your critical needs. There is a way to test this one: How does your mate treat you when you get sick with the flu? Also, if you know deep down that you would not have the patience or fortitude to care for an ailing mate, be fair and let him/her know of your concerns. Who needs someone in his/her life who is only there for the good times?

4. Do you envision us growing old together? If your mate quips, "How the heck do I know, that is a long way off" or "I guess so," neither answer should satisfy you. To suggest that you or your mate is uncertain of your eventual fate together -- or cannot envision those "golden" years as a couple -- should be a neon sign with bright red lights that flash, "This may only be temporary." Commitments should be thought of as permanent, not temporary.

5. Do you ever think about your ex? If the answer from your mate is "Well, I do sometimes," then you want to ask the next question: "In what context?" If your mate shares stories about the fun they used to have together, this could mean your mate is not over his or her last love. And what about you? Do you still think about your ex? When? How? I highly recommend backing off the commitment stage until you and your mate can safely say that thoughts about your exes are fleeting or random.

6. Has your mate ever told you they scared a former mate in any way? If your mate's answer is something like "Well, yeah, I scared my ex every time I became jealous or mad," step back and think twice. Though your mate may think he/she is ready for a commitment, it may not be the right time for one. If you have had similar issues, the same may apply to you. Are you worried your mate might cheat on you or keep secrets from you or inflict emotional or physical harm on you? If the answer is yes, tackle this now, not after you have made a commitment. Maybe you or your mate could benefit from therapy, anger management, rehab, or other appropriate behavior modification assistance.

7. Is your mate good at problem solving? Does your mate meet challenges head on and collaborate on solutions to problems, or sweep issues under the rug? What about you? Are you mature enough to approach your mate to say, "We have a problem. Let's find a solution to it." How you handle problems together may well determine how long your relationship will last.

8. How does my mate deal with a "screwup?" Does my mate place blame? Does my mate take responsibility for his/her actions? How do I handle my mistakes? Do we both acknowledge our errors and resolve to deal with them? If chronic, negative behavior persists in this area, take a second look to decide if you two are a good match and if you are ready to commit. It is not unusual, for instance, to have each partner blame the other, which rarely accomplishes anything. Placing blame, or finding fault, can only worsen once you are committed.




Oh I'm so coming back to fight this later. As it is clearly told with a female perspective of what their utopic mariage should be like. Sistah please! Rolling Eyes

Nappy Soul

Nombre de messages : 439
Date d'inscription : 06/09/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par *Maadox le Jeu 26 Fév - 18:20

CRyma a écrit:
*Maadox a écrit:Thanks vrai silver...i guess we just need to understand that there is an element of unpredictability that will linger...However, we should do our homework.

So what y'all think about "better the devil you know then the one you don't?" as a basis for marring someone?

what about beeing with the angel that I know ? Razz


en2k, je ne connais pas l'expression, que ce qu'elle veut dire ? vaut mieux etre avec quelqu'un dont on connait les defaut, et que, meme si ses defauts la nous font mal on est pret à savoir les accepter ?

Oui Cryma, you got it Very Happy ..c'est une expression nigerianne...lol.

is that what marriage is about? the devil you know rather than the one you don't? lol Very Happy

*Maadox

Nombre de messages : 129
Date d'inscription : 16/11/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par CRyma le Ven 20 Mar - 13:51

lool, je prefere the angel that I know...

l'amour n'est pas supposé faire mal ! scratch

CRyma

Nombre de messages : 1208
Age : 116
Localisation : ........ quelque part .......
Date d'inscription : 13/06/2008

Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Re: Should i marry him or her?

Message par Contenu sponsorisé Aujourd'hui à 22:44


Contenu sponsorisé


Revenir en haut Aller en bas

Voir le sujet précédent Voir le sujet suivant Revenir en haut

- Sujets similaires

 
Permission de ce forum:
Vous ne pouvez pas répondre aux sujets dans ce forum